Activating Your Marriage Success

Welcome to our Marriage and Peace blog for April!

If your marriage is anything like mine, it requires effort and dedication to make it work. While

love and trust are fundamental to a successful marriage, so is having a shared vision about

money.

My husband and I didn’t have a shared vision about money when we married. People advised us to

sit down and talk about it. But we didn’t.

Turns out, we should have.

Talking about money before marriage is important to identify potential conflicts,

understand financial habits, and develop a shared vision for financial goals. It creates a

foundation of trust, communication, and transparency essential for a healthy and

successful marriage.

Since money is one of the leading causes of marital stress, in this month’s article, I’ll talk about the following:

• What a vibrant ‘moneyship’ is.

• Why it’s important to the success of your marriage.

• Three tips for creating one.

We Missed the Moneyship Talk.

Since my husband and I didn’t talk about money, battle-weary and head-strong, we fought about

everything else around money, and made some stupid mistakes with our money.

If only we’d had that Moneyship talk!

What’s a Moneyship?

Moneyship is a word I made up that signifies each couple's relationship with money. There’s

you, there’s your husband, and there’s money. Whether you know it or not, you’re in a threesome

with money the moment you get married.

And if you don’t agree on how to handle your finances, money muck happens.

Here’s an example of what I’m talking about:

From the beginning of our marriage, my husband and I had a lot of anxiety around money — how

much we wanted, how best to spend it, and how’d we grow it. He was anxious about being able to

make enough money for us, and I was fearful of losing it. Deep down, I didn’t trust our ability to have a

safe conversation about it because there was so much tension around it.

So, with little discussion, we decided to buy an overpriced piece of commercial real estate to use

one of the units for the business we were starting up and as an additional source of income from

the tenant's we'd rent the other units to.

Then the market tanked in 2008, and we were left with a behemoth piece of property, tenants

defaulting on their agreements, and no way to sell the property without a huge loss. This created

a ton of money muck that stressed our marriage to the max.

Money Mirrors Marriage

Money is not just a piece of property; it is an energy that flows through our lives. — Lynne Twist

Money is energy. And what's happening in your Moneyship mirrors your marriage.

For example:

My hubster, didn’t trust me to stay within our monthly budget. So, I spent money secretly, hid my

purchases, and lied to him about where stuff came from.

As a result, my hubby doubled down on work and spent less time at home and with me.

Our troubled finances mirrored our troubled marriage.

Money is like water. It can be a conduit for commitment, a currency of love. — Lynne Twist

Three Tips for Creating a Vibrant Moneyship

1. Have monthly date nights with your Moneyship.

Your Moneyship wants a playful, loving, and adventurous relationship with you. Therefore, when

you and your husband sit down to create one, build in monthly date nights so you can come

together and talk about how things are going.

2. Come up with a plan to clean up your money muck.

Begin by communicating openly about everything related to your finances. No shame. No blame.

Talk, forgive, and plan.

3. Embrace your Moneyship.

Let the energy of money be a source of strength and unity in your marriage. Embrace it. Dance

with it. Allow your love and passion to intertwine with the vibrant, powerful force of money.

When you do, you’ll create a thriving, successful marriage and a financially abundant and

prosperous life together.

The Currency of Love

If you’d like to read more about money and how to transform your marriage with it, I highly

recommend The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist.

I've added Lynne's book to my book club for easy access for you!

Soul of Money Institute

Here’s the link if you’d like to explore Lynne Twist’s transformational Soul of Money programs.

https://soulofmoney.org/soul-money-courses/

Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into. -John Randolph Price

Here’s to you and your husband creating a vibrant Moneyship this month and onwards!