7 Relationship Saboteurs

7 Relationship Saboteurs Withdrawal Part 1

July 06, 2024•3 min read

Today’s topic: Saboteur #6 Withdrawing (Part 1)

Before we delve into today's topic, I'm excited to present an opportunity that promises insight into the underlying reasons behind the conflicts you are experiencing with your husband.

Exciting Opportunity

On September 13th-15th, I’m hosting the Stop, Drop, and Roll, Baby! Turnaround weekend — an exclusive event for battle-weary wives that you won’t want to miss!

During this empowering weekend, I'll dive deeper into the 7 relationship saboteurs wreaking havoc in your marriage and introduce you to the revolutionary Stop, Drop, and Roll, Baby! ™ Technique — a method developed from my own battle-weary experiences.

This powerful approach is designed to uncover the ‘why’ behind the ‘what’ of your conflicts and help end the fights between you and your husband. To learn more about this exciting opportunity, watch the video linked here.

In Today’s Blog

When you and your spouse are fighting, and you don’t know the ‘why’ behind the ‘what’ . . . check to see which of the 7 relationship saboteurs is triggering you.

In today’s blog, we’ll look at how Withdrawing manifests, what it looks like and implies, and how this relationship saboteur justifies its actions. Finally, we’ll look at what’s being triggered within you.

Next month, we’ll explore solutions and look at how being triggered can be a transformative moment for yourself and within your marriage as a sacred act.

If this is your first time reading our 7 Relationship Saboteurs mini-series, you’ll want to get up to speed on this transformative information by reading about it here.

Relationship Saboteur #6 Withdrawing

Withdrawal in a marriage refers to one partner emotionally or physically distancing themselves from the other, avoiding communication and engagement, which creates a barrier to intimacy and connection.

1. How it manifests

¡ Emotional unavailability

¡ Detachment

¡ Avoidance of physical affection and intimacy

¡ Spending excessive time alone or away from home

¡ Ignoring or dismissing attempts to engage with you in conversations

2. What it looks like

¡ Silent treatment

¡ Monosyllabic responses

¡ Lack of interest in shared activities

¡ Frequently using distractions like work, hobbies, or electronic devices

¡ Holding back important information or feelings

3. What it implies

· You’re not worthy of consideration.

· You’re being punished.

· You’re overreacting.

· I don’t have time for this

· I can’t handle your emotions let alone mine

· Even if I try, it won’t be good enough

4. How it justifies its actions

¡ "You're always nagging and picking fights."

¡ "I just need some space."

¡ "You make everything into a big deal."

¡ "You never let things go."

· “I don’t see the point in talking about it.”

¡ "I've got a lot on my mind; I don't have time for this."

5. What’s being triggered within you?

If you're on the receiving end of these exchanges, it's only natural to want to retaliate by launching your salvo of relationship saboteurs at your spouse. However, before you do that, understand that the part of you being triggered is an old emotional injury from the past. It's triggering you now so you can examine the wound and evolve past it into the wise adult you're meant to be.

Next month, we’ll explore solutions to this relationship saboteur and look at how triggering can be a transformative moment for yourself and within your marriage as a sacred act.

All it takes is one person in the relationship to understand what’s going on and turn inward for healing, to transform their relationship from battle-weary to thriving strong.

In the meantime, if you’re dealing with a spouse acting out this relationship saboteur and you’d like some support, wives, I'm here for you. Or, if you’d like help as a couple, click here.

In the name of Love, Veronica

Our Marriage War and Peace blog is your go-to resource for keeping you and your marriage strong and healthy by providing information and resources as you navigate the ups and downs of your marriage. And inspiration and hope if you’re battle-weary and ready to throw in the towel. 

As an attorney, family law mediator, and relationship restart specialist, I bring a unique perspective to the conversation on marriage because I’ve “been there, done that” and understand the challenges faced by those struggling in their marriages.

Veronica L. Nabizadeh, Esq., NBC-HWC

Our Marriage War and Peace blog is your go-to resource for keeping you and your marriage strong and healthy by providing information and resources as you navigate the ups and downs of your marriage. And inspiration and hope if you’re battle-weary and ready to throw in the towel. As an attorney, family law mediator, and relationship restart specialist, I bring a unique perspective to the conversation on marriage because I’ve “been there, done that” and understand the challenges faced by those struggling in their marriages.

Instagram logo icon
Youtube logo icon
LinkedIn logo icon
Back to Blog