Today’s topic: Dealing with Relationship Discord.

Welcome back to the Stop, Drop, and Roll, Baby! Blog, your go-to resource for navigating the ups and downs of marriage with grace and resilience.

Now that our children are home for the summer, we're addressing a topic close to home for many of us: Relationship struggles.

But before we dive into today's topic, I have an exciting announcement to share.

Announcement:

Mark your calendars for September 13-15 because we're hosting the Stop, Drop, and Roll, Baby! Turnaround weekend — an event specially designed for battle-weary wives.

During this transformative weekend, we'll uncover the 7 relationship saboteurs causing havoc in marriages. We'll also delve deeper into the Stop, Drop, and Roll Technique — a powerful method that not only saved my marriage but countless others.

To learn more about this life-changing event, watch the video linked here.

When things heat up — and they inevitably will — you'll want to know how to stop, drop, and roll, baby!

And for those new to our Stop, Drop, and, Roll, Baby! mini-series, take a moment to read about its origins here. It's a story of transformation and resilience that has saved countless marriages.

Now, let’s dive into today’s topic.

How to Stop, Drop, and Roll with Your Relationship Struggles

1. Stop blaming and arguing. When conflicts arise, it’s easy to fall into a pattern of blaming and arguing. Recognize when these moments happen and make a conscious effort to stop launching any Relationship Saboteur missiles. If you’re not familiar with Relationship Saboteurs, check out my Relationship Saboteur mini-series.

2. Drop unrealistic expectations. Relationships suffer under the weight of unrealistic expectations. Release the idea that your husband and children should understand you perfectly when you communicate or fulfill all your needs.

3. Roll into empathy and understanding. Once you’ve stopped the cycle of blaming and dropped unrealistic expectations, it’s time to roll into empathy and understanding, first for yourself. You won't be able to help anyone else process their feelings until you first process yours. So, take a walk, journal, or meditate to understand better what happened. Use your time away to reflect on what triggered you (not who). And the hurt piece within you that needs your attention. Then, ask the family member you argued with to sit down and talk about what happened. Practice active listening and empathy to understand your family member's perspective better. Hear their concerns, validate their feelings, and respond with compassion. Then, share what triggered you. * By fostering empathy, you build a stronger emotional connection and create a foundation of mutual respect and support.

* Don't push for reconciliation if you or your family member isn’t ready to talk. Instead, communicate the need for more time by saying:

“I’m still upset and need some more time to calm down. Let’s talk about this tomorrow at a specific time.”

All it takes is one person in the relationship to stop, drop, and roll to smother the flames. Then, when it’s time, you’ll return to the conversation feeling inner-centered, emotionally balanced, and ready to invite conversation. 

In the meantime, if the flames are getting hot and you'd like help putting them out, wives, I’m here for you. Or, if you’d like help as a couple, click here.